In my largely non-existant love life, i find ways of keeping my self amused and momentary occupied. So far i have managed to disentangle my emotions from my little distractions until now. Have you ever met someone who just clicked with you and they simply gelled with your flow. With my high rate of boredom with people, saying that is a rare occurence in itself. Maybe am falling for someone and maybe am not. Who knows? Maybe its my hormones talking. It’s sometimes hard to tell the difference. Men, you are not alone in the quest to understand women. I surprise myself at times.
You know how they say that from the depth of the heart emanates all thoughts and feelings of a man. If you ask me, the heart is a huge junk pile of stuff that doesn’t even understand itself. Judging from the self contradicting thoughts that show up from time to time, i bet my thesis holds some weight. Thus the ability of a saintly being to metamorphose into a devil’s reincarnate when pushed to it. Maybe am just suffering from guilt because i am currently ignoring certain calls from a certain someone? Or is it that the thought of stabbing someone suddenly seems appealing? Or maybe am just losing it and i don’t have a clue? Too many questions, too few answers. No wonder i don’t study philosophy. Endless questions give me a headache.
Divorcing oneself from you emotions is not always wise because when they start flowing in you, you doubt you very sanity. I may be bit by the love bug but i am fighting against myself. This love thing is complex and that is why i locked up that department until further notice. This is the stuff that makes people jump of cliffs and catch grenades so before i habour any suicidal tendencies for a fellow mortal, i will enjoy the tranquility of singlehood. In other words, my heart is acting up but i don’t really care. It’s a passing phase. Hopefully *gulp* .